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Asking Positive Questions.

Framing questions in a positive way is a must-have skill for anyone who plans to be successful. Asking positive questions requires some discipline before you feel how they help you be more effective, and it takes time to learn to see the good side in everything, but I’m going to make it all a bit easier for you.

Today I’d like to share with you some principles which are key to positive questions. If you believe you don’t know how to ask anything in a positive way, let’s see how I can help you. If you can relate to anything written below, please leave a comment – I’d love to discuss positive questions in more detail and your opinion will definitely help me identify future topics.

One of the most basic things, seeing the good side in everything, may be tricky if you never tried this concept before.
How about this: every problem is a challenge, and every challenge has a good reason behind it. We just have to look really hard to see it, and one of the ways to do it is to simply start with – you guessed right – simple but positive questions:
What is good about this?What is the positive way to describe it?What is the best thing I can do right now?What benefits does it give me?What can I learn from it?
These questions can and should be asked about any challenge you find yourself facing. The most important rule for them is this: by definition, positive questions get only positive answers. If some negative thought tries to get into one of your answers – throw it away. Positive question accepts only positive answer! No exceptions.

At work, you are given a task which you don’t understand. The result isn’t clear, but the stakes are high and the deadline is very real. There’s the typical pressure, and this naturally makes you nervous.

Positive questions may help you turn this whole situation around, and here’s how:
What is good about this situation? It’s a challenge. The stakes are high – which means you will get rewarded when you get it done.
What is the positive way to describe it? It’s an opportunity for you to learn something new, get a very important task done and recommend yourself as someone people can count on.
What is the best thing you can do right now? You should talk to your boss or your colleagues to confirm what exactly the task is. Just full understanding of the task alone will make the task much easier to accomplish.
What benefits does this assignment give me? Plenty: you will acquire some new relevant knowledge. You will boost your confidence level when you accomplish such a tricky task. You will earn the trust of your colleagues. You can even get promoted for doing something like this!
What can I learn from it? Once the task definition and a list of objectives are confirmed, you should be able to list a few new things you will learn from working on it. Sometimes it will be knowledge specific to your field, in others you will only acquire or improve general skills like problem solving, project management basics, communication skills, improve your brainstorming or presentation skills. When you put this into perspective – that any challenge, no matter how negative it seems, teaches you something new and useful – it starts meaning a lot.

Learn to see the good side of things! If you’re given a challenge, look for ways to get maximum benefit from it, not how to get rid of it with minimal embarrasment.

That’s right! Agree with yourself to not tolerate the negativity anymore!
First of all, you should stop yourself from being negative. This includes, but is sadly not limited to, the following things you have to stop:

Calling yourself stupid, slow, fat, ugly, or anything else


Simply stop doing this, once and for all. Remember: every time you say something like this to yourself, you’re reassuring your mind of the partial truth in what you’re saying. And since we ALWAYS exaggerate the negativity in such exclamations, you’re slowly but surely making things only worse.

 Stop using negative affirmations!

This is simple. Every time you need to give an answer to any question, give it whichever way you want, but don’t use the negative affirmations. If you’re asked for a name of a friend which you can’t remember, instead of saying “I can’t remember”, say “Let me think, I should definitely remember”. If some question seems to hard to answer, instead of getting back to the “I can’t” right away, use every way possible to reassure yourself you can answer it. The reality of most challenges is that they’re only challenging because of some situational constraints. You may not be able to give a definite answer only because you’ve forgotten an important name, however you may know the rest of the story. Still, instead of explaining it, you would rather say “I don’t know”.

Reporting positive progress in negative terms

That’s a very common issue for everyone. We tend to use negative words in reporting any kind of progress, thus diminishing the little positive steps in the right direction. If your goal is to lose 5kg, and you’ve lost 2kg so far, you’ll more likely to say “I’m still too fat” than “I’m in great shape and almost hit my target”. It’s unbelievable how much insecurity we plant in our minds by simply not recognizing the success we’ve already seen. If you haven’t finished 2 tasks out of 5 on your list, instead of saying “I haven’t completed 2 tasks of 5?, say “I’ve got 3 major tasks out of the way! 2 more to go”. Wording is everything. Don’t let the negative terms make your accomplishments smaller than they really are!

A well-known example: a visit to a physician. Given the same situation, one of the doctors might say “75% of people in your situation recover without any problem”. The other one could give the same piece of information by saying “25% of patients in your situation never make a recovery”. Can you guess which diagnosis most people would like to hear, and which of the two physicians they like prefer talking to? You see, the same information sounds and makes people feel very differently depending on the words used to deliver the message. Stop using negative affirmations! There are no things you can’t do and no things you don’t know. There’s only a bit more time you may need to concentrate on improving yourself or thinking how to best present the solution.

Next time you find yourself in a dreadful situation, take the time to recognize all the possible ways to look at it and extract something useful out of the experience.

The most important thing about recognizing the good about seemingly bad is to expect the positive outcome, to look for this with a certainty. Something positive has to be in any situation, and that’s what you need to do – find it.

Now, I’m not suggesting you try to fool yourself. When the situation looks awful, don’t pretend everything’s great if you don’t believe it. But find just one good reason to go on, and settle on it. Don’t expect this reason to outweigh all the negativity of the challenge. In many cases, it won’t be possible.

But working out the habit to see good in everything you do, recognizing the positive possibilities no matter how small they are compared to the rest negativity is exactly how you eventually learn to look at each and every challenge from the positive side.

Eventually, you will learn to see the good instantly, and feel like you really have to try hard to understand what can be so bad about each situation – you will turn things around in your mind.

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Why sharing knowledge is vital to Your success!!

Sharing your knowledge, especially if it’s useful and unique, isn’t always easy. There are plenty of reasons why you should do this, but somehow it’s very easy to get stopped by negative assumptions. In today’s post, I’d like to share my opinion on sharing knowledge, and ask for yours in return.

Naturally, most of us feel competition. Even in your own team, you’re bound to think now and then of how good or bad your performance is compared to that of other team members. While this is absolutely natural, you shouldn’t let such a competition spirit get in the way of you sharing the knowledge with others.

One of the worst things you can do is to refuse sharing the knowledge with your team. When you do this, you may have your own reasons, but even if you tell them, your peers would get their own, very different ideas.

One of the most common reasons for not sharing is the fear of losing your unique advantage. I used to think that it’s always best to have a unique skillset within a team, and never share any of the knowledge with others. The more you know of things nobody else knows, the better. Boy, was I wrong in such thinking!

The truth is, all the knowledge must be shared. If you think a bit longer, you will understand that no matter how good you are, if you work for a company and act on behalf of a certain team of people – this implies that everything you know or learn must be shared. You are paid for achieving collective results, and if this means teaching others how to do everything you’re capable of, then do your best and show them. You are not paid for making life harder for other team members just because you’re not feeling like sharing something.

Being open with your team and freely sharing anything you know is one of the major signs of you being comfortable where you are. Being a great team player depends on your comfortable participation in every process of such a team, including knowledge exchange. In addition to this, shared knowledge ensures your team stays safe should anything unexpected happen to you – even if you’re temporarily unavailable, your team members will be quite comfortable covering for you with the information you had previously shared with them.

There is a certain point in your professional life, when you suddenly see how most of your fears were really amateur. In fact, I’m sure that every fear you have about your job becomes silly at some stage of your career. Every single one of your fears can and will be smiled upon one day – you’ll look back and laugh how you were afraid of doing something so simple or easy. It’s just a matter of time and a subject to your ever-expanding experience.

With this in mind, I’m going to save you the trouble of figuring out most of the competition fears which stop so many people from sharing their knowledge. I’m giving you the false statements similar to the ones I myself had once believed to be true.

Before we start: Using this opportunity, I’d like to apologize for my behavior to some of the people I’ve been lucky enough to work with in my career so far. I also thank you, for if it wasn’t for the support and guidance from some of you, I would have never changed for the better.

Here they are, the statements which you should never accept, long with my advice on how to act in every situation:

False statement: If you don’t have a unique skill, you will no longer be needed in your team and will probably be fired.

Yep, that’s exactly how I looked at sharing knowledge at some stage in my life (the first years of my career, to be precise). Now, I admit that some companies support and promote such a behavior among their employees, but without cooperation and shared knowledge it’s impossible to have people function as a team.


My advice: Skills, not matter unique or not, can’t really be shared. They are your own ways of doing things, of applying the knowledge the most effective way. Your knowledge can and should be shared, but skills are always going to be yours – there will never be two people on a team with exactly the same skills, so you shouldn’t worry about it. If you explain everything you know to others, you will only gain wider acceptance as an authority.

False statement: If I give away everything I know, my services will no longer be needed as other team members will be doing everything themselves

My advice: if you have so much knowledge you worry about sharing it, you’re probably an avid learner. This means it will never become possible for you to give everything away, because you’ll be learning something new almost every day. If others start doing more based on the knowledge they get from you, this will give you a chance to work on new and perhaps more exciting projects.

You know what? Eventually there comes a time when you want to move on. When you’re no longer feeling like you’re giving most value by staying in your position and doing what you currently do. And guess what – until you have your knowledge properly shared, you won’t be able to leave your functions behind!

Another common way this happens is that you become so unique and so good ad your particular functions, that everyone else in your team wants you and only you to keep doing it! Sometimes your colleagues won’t let you work on other things just because this will mean you’ll have to abandon some of the common functions you’ve been doing so far. For them, it can be an unnecessary risk – nobody knows how good you’ll be at new things, but everyone knows you’re really good with your current functions. So, before you decide that you want to move on to something new, be sure to get into the habit of sharing.

False statement: If I share everything, I will never stand out enough to be promoted

My advice: you never get promoted based on the knowledge you possess, it’s always to do with your experience and results – both measuring your ability to apply the knowledge.

You can get hired partially because of your vast knowledge, yes. But promotions usually happen because you grow out of your position by accepting more responsibilities and doing more. This happens not because your professional knowledge grows, but because your become more aware of processes in your organization and recognize the potential for improvements. The higher you are in your career, the more personality-based your success is, and the less it is dependent on your professional skills. The value you bring to the team or organization is rarely based only on your knowledge of the processes, it’s increasingly more to do with how comfortable you are doing what you do and taking on new projects and challenges.

Sharing knowledge is one of the best things you can do to become a great team player and ultimately a leader. It is essential not only for the success of people around you, but for your own success in the first place. The more you share, the more people respect you. The more respected you feel, the more you’re willing to share. The more you give away, the more new opportunities come your way.

Perhaps my advices won’t cover every possible situation you can find yourself in, but they’re drawn from my own experience. I know how hard it is to learn from somebody else’s mistakes and not your own ones, but my advice stays the same – learn to share the knowledge, and you’ll thank yourself later.

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What is personal development?

Personal development is as old as Plato and Aristotle. In fact, personal development was considered by many societies as the only true vocation. They also believed that the study and application of the philosophy was the best method for personal development.

Several individuals in the history and diverse cultures have been discussed and studied the need and the ways of achieving personal development. It has sometimes been called "virtues" or "moral character", and others referred to as "ethics".Christianity has been concerned with the "moral development" people and took their "virtues" in the Biblia.estos are: faith, hope and charity or love and agape.

Accordance with such as defined by the ancient Greeks it was: the commitment to "usual excellence".

In most cases was the main concern, "personal development".Each defines the means to achieve this development.Aristotle believed that it was necessary for the "golden mean" between a trait and is just as contrario.Tomemos example Aristotle courage."Courage is the balance between cowardice (deficit of courage) and reckless (excess of courage)".for what both average Aristotle's gold would be in the middle between these two extremes, but lying closer "recklessness of cowardice".

Benjamin Franklin developed a system of week 13 which focused on a character trait by semana.Enumerados below are traits considered most important for him to work to succeed.

Character traits

Self-control: will be determined and disciplined in their efforts.

Silence: hear better in all discussions.

Order: does not persist - organize.

Promise: the promise of putting his best effort activities today.

Savings: see how they spend their time and money.

Productivity: work hard intelligent work have fun.

Equity: treat others the way you want to be treated.

Moderation: avoid extremes.

Cleaning: have a clean mind, body and habits.

Tranquility: Take time to slow down and "smell the Roses".

Charity: helping others.

Humility: keep your ego under control.

Sincerity: be honest with you and others.

These are only brief examples of the history of "character development", or "personal development".Beyond this article is to provide a history of personal development, but I can give you a brief discussion of how personal development means to me.

Stephen Covey in his books on "7 habits of highly effective people", analyses the evolution of "personal development".In a section he talks of his study of personal development and makes a comment importante.Sostiene before the Decade of 1920 and 1930, personal development defines as "Character development".Ben Franklin traits of character list highlights the idea that a person needs to develop its "nature".

However, in the Decade of 1920 and then says that personal development approach changed character development "development of the personality".The approach to development changed internal development to focus on external features of a person or personality traits, such as a "pleasant personality", or "have a positive personality".With this as a guideline, it is not important if we really have a positive personality or if we have a pleasant personality, is more important to "Act" as Mr. Covey tenemos.El maintains that this translates into other virtues and features and so we ended up with flash all and no substance.

Mr. Covey provides several examples of this and used the then President Clinton and other politicians, such as the example.Instead of "feel" honest or committed to excellence and integrity, decided to "Act" honest or acting as a person with integrity is most important, due to the following appeal to the broadest possible voter base.

I was on treatment for alcoholism in 1977 and 1978.This March, celebrated 30 years of being clean and sobrio.Cuando I first bump in 1978, the self-help groups, such as Alcoholics Anonymous exploded at the American scene.

Since then we have with many groups that made themselves of Alcoholics Anonymous, adoption and change twelve steps of A.A. to suit your particular problem.

"" However, on the basis of all of them, is the development of "personnel or character".Bill Wilson, co-founder of A.A., says in his book, "just as the seat of the It Bill", "the main objective of the 12 steps of a.una, is" character development ". continued by saying," but whoever wants to talk about or work on his "character"? also asserts that A.A., is a kindergarten espiritual.Si well the overriding objective of A.A., abstinence from alcohol, Mr. Wilson holds that the only way to achieve this goal by commit, a day at the same time, the development of our character.

This is true of other self-help programs that use anonymous alcoholics as its foundation.

On a personal level, couple months ago, my son, is 14 years old, I was teasing of "self-help" book I leído.Le said should be grateful that I continued to read and use these books, because if not, your life and mine would be totally different and not in a good way.

Improves staff, in my experience spans all areas of our emotional vidas.Mental physics and espiritual.Hay an old said a.una, who said, "if not going forward in your life, going backwards".Esto means there is no quo.No status we cannot rest on our laurels or what did Ben Franklin ayer.Como showed, self-improvement is a life-time activity, and if we are not actively pursing excellence we are at the mercy of mediocrity.

As someone pointed out, "if not we are pursing our own targets, we are working for someone's objectives".

Development personnel, to me, gives sense my life.it for me a yard stick to measure my progress in life what is development staff? when drawing first, I went to a meeting where on the wall behind the speakers were two boards.

On Board was included in the list of about 20 different traits, such as courage, integrity, patience, gratitude, determination, persistence, etc. positive character.On the other Board was listed their opponents.

During the meeting at least once a week, my sponsor could lean envelope and quietly asked me, "which side of the Board you are in"?

A commitment to personal development ensures that I stay on the right side of the Board!

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